Panic moment

I am fucking afraid, that's all it is. I always say I won't let fear interfere with my life but it's there all the time. I was sure of it, now I have all I need but everything remains the same : I am scared.
My heart sinks and breathing is hard. Each day is another new fear : what bad things will happen again? What will I do wrong again? How will I manage to upset you this time?
Whether it is about you, friends, work or only myself, there is always something to worry about. I don't know if I'll ever get over this, even though I try.

Oh I've tried so long, but each time I manage to climb up this stiff cliff, I have the feeling I fall again. I don't make progress. I did make some progress once but now I feel too weak to go any further. Or do I want to?

I take advantage of this post to to lead you to this song left outside alone. This is a strong woman's song, I admire such willpower. Actually not for the song but for the person. The song is just a reflection of the feelings in this post...

Panic moment over now, bathing in it is not helpful.